Monday, December 26, 2016

2016 ~ Reflections

So I just posted on Facebook the following status..

Ok... so I'm not getting all the "let's watch 2016 die" memes out there.. I mean we only get ONE LIFE.. and a short one at that. whether it was the best year ever, or a year of struggle.
*YOU are still here
*you are still breathing
*you are still alive..
make the most of that shit!!! This life is limited, we are not even promised tomorrow.. 2016 marked 366 days in your life.. Cherish the hell out of that, good or less than stellar.. and if it wasn't great, figure out a way to be happier in the future.. We do have the option to CHOOSE happiness.

And I was still up and feeling a bit reflective so I thought I'd elaborate a bit on 2016 for me...

It wasn't the easiest year of my life.  Honestly, I really couldn't tell you any year that has been "easy"..  no one year really sticks out for me as that.  Every year has come with struggles, joys, triumph, happiness and heartache... that's life.  And this year, well, it was 366 days of mine.

January started kind of sketchy..  I had what I thought was a UTI that ended up being something more permanent.  I am a nurse and was able to be adamant about obtaining a diagnosis of what the hell was wrong with me.. so in a week or so, I saw my primary doc, my OB/GYN, had an ER visit, and finally was sent to urologist.  And of course, during that week I went through a bunch of tests too.. mostly relatively easy.. but still..  I was a patient.  Nurses make the WORST patients...

Oh and did I mention in the midst of all of this I was supposed to go on a trip with my kids to Key West???  Their aunt lives there and we had direct flights so I sent the girls off without me..  But what a massive disappointment that was.

Oh the final diagnosis after all those tests was done after having a minor bladder surgery..  Interstitial Cystitis.  Google it.  I did, and found all kinds of scary information that made me think my life was going to be OVER as I knew it and my health would never be ok.  So my anxiety and depression kicked into overdrive and I was a basketcase for a bit..

After going on some medicine and healing from the surgery, I got better.  I'm still not 100% and i'm bothered by my bladder pretty much at some point daily, but it's more like a "twinge" than feeling horrible.  It's liveable and I deal with it.  I try not to focus on it, and I definitely don't let myself go to that place that makes me feel like I'm going to end up debilitated.  It is what it is.  It's part of life.

In February, I needed to use my unused plane ticket due to using a credit to pay for part of it when it was originally purchased.  My husband decided to take a few days off work, my mom offered to take my kids, and off we went... to Florida!!  I went to Disney World for the first time in literal YEARS and had a blast with my husband.  I still wasn't 100%, I definitely didn't feel as well as I do now.  I saw every bathroom at WDW and in Clearwater... but I went.  and had a blast.  And saw that my life wasn't over.

In March, we closed on our house.  I have never owned a house and this was HUGE.  I'm still super excited that we have our house now.  So yeah, another good thing ;)

In April, we were living between 2 houses as we did some renovations on the house we bought.  The girls' rooms were torn down to the studs and redone, and 70% or so of the house was painted.. we have ONE ROOM left right now to paint.  (and go figure, its the worst one of them all ;) ).  It was a crazy month but we got through it with a lot of heart and hustle. lol.

In May, we finally were fully in this house, ready or not. ;)  And of course it was full on dance competition season, so we were still BUSY.   But so happy.  We were in our house, it was coming together, and did I mention I have a POOL!!!!! It's above ground, but I don't care.  It's something I have literally ALWAYS wanted.

June, July, August - As always summer went by in a flash..  but a huge thing for me this summer was finding Beachbody and starting my health/fitness journey.  It was the summer I began to work on me.  I fell in love with working out and working on ME.  Personal development, positivity and just CHOOSING to be happy took hold of my life in ways they hadn't before.  I actually made a lifestyle change to a healthier life and stuck with it.  I gained a crap ton of confidence.  I started posting live videos on facebook.. many without make up on @@.. something that scared the crap out of me before... I feel like I really came into my own. 

We also took a family trip to Walt Disney World.  We stayed on property for a week. It was amazing.. but exhausting.  I can't wait to go back again.  I'm scheming for a 2017 trip as we speak.. I may actually have some tentative plans booked :P

OHHHH  I also took a job in the ICU at my hospital.  Training was intense this summer and worth it as I became a better nurse.  I also decided at least for now, that the ICU isn't my thing.. and that's ok.  I'm going back to my old job next week.. ;)

September - Back to school..  the girls went back to school a day or so after our Disney trip and I finished my ICU orientation and began working on my own in the unit.  It was ok. Not too eventful of a month..

October - The highlight was definitely a trip to Myrtle Beach with my sister and my kids to see their older sister get married.  It was gorgeous, the beach was deserted, and the wedding was spectacular.  I can't wait to visit there again.  Neither can the kids.

And well... the remainder of the year has been good..  November I worked my  butt off in the beginning of the month and actually lost some weight prior to Thanksgiving..  Of course, I indulged some over the  holidays but for the first time in FOREVER, I didn't really gain anything this holiday season.

Guys, I know this got long, and probably a bit boring...  but I just want to say that you need to appreciate your life.  You need to choose happy.  You don't get to choose what happens in your life, you don't get to always choose your circumstances and I KNOW that I am blessed beyond belief to have had the freedom to make some of the choices that I have had in life, but you get to choose what to focus on.

Focus on the GOOD.  Focus on what you CAN do. Believe in YOU, and for cripes' sake CREATE a life of HAPPY.  If you want some help, want some advice, want to be hooked up with people and tools that helped me to shift my mindset and create my happy..  let me know!!  I really would LOVE to be that person for you.